Control. I think that pretty much summed up my childhood. I learned at an early age that raw emotions weren’t welcoming so I turned inward. Perfection was an unrealistic goal and I pushed to achieve it. I was very emotional and crying was thought of as a weakness.
There aren’t any “bad” emotions, just negative ways to express them. I go through daily rollercoasters, but I’ve learned how to reflect and express them appropriately. I still struggle at times, but that just reminds me once again that I’m human and perfection is unattainable.